These Changes Often Have the Greatest Impact

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    93 people had breakthroughs this week. Will the next one be you?

    Two things for you to think about

    When I was 20, I promised myself I’d never be a boring old person who never drank, went to bed at 9PM, and stayed home on weekends.

    Now, at 40, I wonder why I waited so long to start.

    We imagine our problems as impossibly complex, but really, a few simple changes—better sleep, modest exercise, less drinking—can help solve anything.

    Reflect: Then consider sharing this thought with others.

    Three things for you to ask yourself

    What simple lifestyle habits are potentially holding you back? What are your justifications for those habits? What are a few simple changes you can make to start undoing some of them?

    Recommended: Use these as journaling prompts for the week.

    One thing for you to try this week

    Make one small lifestyle change this week. Note how much it affects everything else. Why did you wait so long to start?

    Remember: Small changes lead to lasting breakthroughs. Reply to this email and let me know how it went for you.

    New This Week

    How to Go From Boring to Extraordinary (ft. Codie Sanchez) – In an era where “quiet quitting” and “self-care” obsessions are all the rage, there’s a huge opportunity to set yourself apart—and it’s not as hard as you might think. In last week’s podcast episode, I sat down with Codie Sanchez who set herself apart by turning “boring businesses” into a multi-million dollar enterprise. This was a fun interview where we explored her unique perspective on life, relationships, and happiness. Check it out.

    Last week’s breakthroughs

    In last week’s newsletter, I asked you to make a conscious choice to stop being upset or offended by something. Turns out my challenge was exactly what this reader needed:

    This one hit home hard. I have recently started feeling really depressed and having anxiety attacks at work.

    There is an office bully and I am letting them get to me. I can now see I am allowing them to make me feel like this when really I should be laughing it off as it comes from a place of jealousy and because their lack of knowledge is being shown to the full workforce.

    Over the last week I have started talking less, explaining myself less and taking less offense. I have realized I don’t deserve to feel the way this person makes me feel and this makes me feel fucking good!

    Thanks Mark for making me realize I have the power over my own emotions and thoughts. I can be less offended because their opinion is none of my goddamn business.

    Our next reader has been taking less offense for months, with amazing results:

    I couldn’t stand criticism. I was very, very bad at accepting I had done something wrong and was wildly offended when someone would tell me I could do something better. I was a high achiever as a child so I was almost never criticized. Then mental illness hit and then: adulthood (eek).

    Now I take it with a smile and an ‘okay, fair enough. How am I going to fix this?’ and the feedback on that attitude has been so positive! I was criticized very harshly at my previous job but also had a very supportive boss. Sounds weird, I know. But it made me realize I can’t go through my life trying to defend my own faults.

    I’m currently in a job with a fabulous boss again and I think part of it is he knows he can count on me to make things work and I don’t shy away from my own problems. Incidentally, that helps keep the mental illness at bay as well. I actually have two jobs now when a few months back I couldn’t even make one work.

    Lastly, Michael is choosing to no longer be upset when asked about his unfinished book:

    I’ve been struggling to finish my next book. It’s a year overdue. But internally, I’m mostly okay with that. There are reasons. I’m getting there, I’m happy with the story now, and the end is in sight.

    But whenever people ask about it, especially other writers, I suddenly feel like a failure. I imagine what’s in their head: he’s still writing that? I leap into self-deprecation. I apologize, even when, most of the time, they’re just being polite. I’ve started avoiding my friends’ book launches because of it.

    Reading this, however, made me see that it’s not about the launches or others—it’s about me and the power I’m giving those thoughts. The next time someone asks, I’m going to own it, as best I can.

    As a fellow author, there is absolutely nothing wrong with being a year late on your book. Hell, only a year late is pretty quick compared to a lot of authors I’ve known. Keep at it.

    As always, send your breakthroughs by simply replying to this email. Let me know if you’d prefer to remain anonymous.

    Until next week,

    Mark Manson

    #1 New York Times Bestselling Author
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