Life Is Too Short for This

53 people had breakthroughs this week. Will the next one be you?

One thing for you to think about

Cut the crap.

Literally, cut the unnecessary distractions out of your life—delete apps, unfriend and unfollow toxic people, stop committing to activities you don’t care about.

Two things for you to ask yourself

What unnecessary distractions have you let take over your life? What can you do right now to stop?

One thing for you to try this week

Cut out one distraction this week and spend the time on something worthwhile. Let me know how that feels.

Last week’s breakthroughs

In last week’s newsletter, I asked you to do something difficult but important: find gratitude in a struggle in your life.

Andy is finding silver linings in grave illness:

I suffered a serious brain injury out of the blue in April 2023, which sucked for all the obvious reasons. Haven’t been able to work since, got made redundant from my job of 15 years, can’t get a loan to buy a house. Had to regain my movement on my left hand side, can’t do as much as I used to, the list goes on…

But equally, I’ve also identified a significant number of silver linings, and personal growth that have come out of this enforced life change. And in fact in a really strange way I’m extremely grateful for this brain injury. I’m probably the fittest, and healthiest I’ve ever been in my life. I’ve stopped drinking alcohol completely (and I was working in the beer industry!), I’m exercising five times a week, eating better than I ever have, and I’m making the time to prioritize my health and wellness, and be thankful for the simple things in life that I used to miss or take for granted.

Admittedly, it’s a long road, and my recovery (‘the struggle’) is ongoing but I’m learning so much about myself, and life, that it’s impossible not to see the positives out of what may otherwise be viewed as such a negative situation.

Kaylee has been struggling to start a family:

Here’s the struggle I’m grateful for this Thanksgiving. I’ve been trying to get pregnant for the last nine months without success and it’s starting to take a toll on me mentally and emotionally. I know many women struggle to conceive for much longer than that, but last week, after hearing that two of our friends are pregnant after trying for only 2-4 months, I found myself feeling jealous and impatient. I’m starting to realize that this may be a more difficult journey for us but I’ve decided to be grateful for the lessons it’s teaching me.

I’m grateful that my fiancé and I have had the chance to talk about these challenges and strengthen our relationship. But on an even deeper level, I’m thankful that I’m being asked to fully let go, relinquish control, and manage my emotions and mental health through it all. Because really, there’s no better preparation for starting a family. I’m a planner by nature and if I did get a positive result right away, it may have falsely reinforced that I could just plan out every other stage in raising a child, assuming it’ll all just go exactly how I want it to. The penny would drop at some point and I’d realize that I’m not in control of who my children are and it’s actually not about me at all. To experience even the smallest bit of that realization so early on is actually a blessing and something I am grateful for.

Although it’s still challenging and can be disappointing, I’m choosing gratitude for this struggle and for teaching me all the lessons I need to learn before hopefully starting a family.

Finally, one reader found compassion through caring for their pet:

The challenge I’m thankful for is snoring on the couch in my living room. In 2018 we adopted an adult dog. She had been waiting for a home for more than a year. She was described as ‘quirky,’ and had a serious mental illness. We were unprepared for what that meant. Can an animal even have mental health issues? Aren’t those just behavior problems?

Having Belle in our home was a big challenge and it still is from time to time. I’ve learned so much from it. I have trouble seeing mental illness in people without judgment. Is some of their suffering from their own choices? Does that mean they have control over their situation?

My dog doesn’t make day-to-day choices like people do, she just lives her life and that includes coping with the challenges her own brain throws at her. She’s happy, curious and brave, in spite of her ‘quirks.’ I’ve learned to be honest with myself about my judgments. It’s made me more compassionate with others and myself.

As always, send your breakthroughs by simply replying to this email. Let me know if you’d prefer to remain anonymous.

Until next week,

Mark Manson

#1 New York Times Bestselling Author
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