Here’s the Thing About Trust

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    0 people had breakthroughs this week. Will the next one be you?

    One thing for you to think about

    Trust takes years to build but only a few minutes to break.

    Think twice before ruining it.

    Reflect: Then consider sharing this thought with others.

    Two things for you to ask yourself

    In what ways do you potentially put years of trust at risk? Is it worth it?

    Recommended: Use these as journaling prompts for the week.

    One thing for you to try this week

    Pick a relationship—partner, parent, child, friend, colleague, etc.—in your life and do one thing to deepen the trust you have. Let me know how it goes.

    Remember: Small changes lead to lasting breakthroughs. Reply to this email and let me know how it went for you.

    Last week’s breakthroughs

    In last week’s newsletter, I asked you to stop consuming one thing that’s making you feel less like yourself.

    Swapnil decided his self-label had been hurting him, and did something about it:

    I have been self-taught for almost all of my life (outside of professional education, of course!)—and while it is a very fulfilling journey, it has a few negatives as well.

    I consume too much on any topic—be it how-to videos on YouTube, long-form content like blogs, white paper, research, etc., and non-stop reels and shorts! Often suffering from information overload, leading to no action, but still feeling mentally exhausted.

    Since the beginning of this year, instead of complaining about the algorithm and my trait of going in the ‘rabbit hole,’ I started leveraging them.

    I have two focused goals for the year: start my beverage business and focus on my health. That’s it.

    Any content which is not pushing me further or offering a new perspective—I straight away flag as not-interested, do not show again, or simply block. It took the algorithm 2-3 weeks to understand what I am doing! And once it did, it did its thing—to help me instead of distracting or overwhelming me.

    Since July, I have taken it a step further and uninstalled all the social media and messaging apps (except for WhatsApp) and I am confident that I have reclaimed at least 90 mins of my day and many hours of after-thought and rabbit-holing.

    Since turning 50, Trisha has been reflecting on her relationship with the world, which led to her giving up two things for good:

    My husband and I used to love reality TV. The drama, the shock, the amazement of how young people approach their world. It was all entertainment for us… until we realized that we were absorbing the feelings of those TV characters. The drama and the stress and the anxiety of their lives bled into our own. We didn’t realize it was happening, but when we did, it was a push to stop. We also decided that Facebook had to go, not permanently, we can go the long way and log in through our internet browser, but we got rid of the app that constantly had a red number beside that famous ‘f.’ Whatever compulsion that was over us to check to see what that notification was all about just ruled us! The drama that everyone in our friends’ lists would post, and the endless scrolling… it is true that you are what you consume even if you don’t realize it! I was personally absorbing their stress, and finding myself on that app for hours and hours.

    Once I removed those two things from my life I have found a lot more peace. I can focus on the things that make me happy. Truly happy. That’s what it is all about… enjoying every moment, surrounding yourself with things and people that feed you and bring out your best self. Life is way too short and what you do with it daily, truly matters. It matters to everyone you come into contact with and it comes full circle each and every time!

    Finally, Kim from my membership community said goodbye to weed and found herself:

    I smoked weed almost daily for approximately 17 years. My spouse was a heavier smoker than I. I thought it was helping to reduce work stress, and it was fun. It was definitely a way to be social… with other smokers.

    But I grew tired of it. I quit in 2014. I had talked to my spouse several times about us cutting back or quitting together. But it never worked. So I did it on my own. Pretty much cold turkey. I knew it would probably lead to divorce, which it did, a few years later after discovering we had nothing in common while he continued to get high every day.

    But I am actually a much happier person now for a variety of reasons. I don’t do any recreational drugs or drink alcohol anymore.

    Life is so much easier and better now.

    Kim’s sharing above was in response to a prompt I asked over 1,000 members of my online community during our Happiness, Solved Course: When has pleasure genuinely lifted your happiness—and when has it felt hollow, numbing, or performative?

    If you’d like one thing to learn, one action to do, and one prompt to answer each day that is guaranteed to make your life better—plus the support of a community passionate about growth—check out my online membership or join it here. This month we’ve been working on happiness. Next up: shame.

    As always, send your breakthroughs by simply replying to this email. Let me know if you’d prefer to remain anonymous.

    Until next week,

    Mark Manson

    #1 New York Times Bestselling Author
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