You Want to Be Bored

27 people had breakthroughs this week. Will the next one be you?

One thing for you to think about

Everything that matters most in life will sometimes bore you.

Your marriage will bore you.
Your career will bore you.
Your kids will bore you.

But boredom isn’t a sign that you chose wrong. It’s a signal that you have chosen to make something more important than your own momentary pleasure. It’s the hidden fee that comes with purpose and meaning.

Three things for you to ask yourself

Where in your life are you chasing excitement instead of depth? How has that worked out for you?

What have you stayed with long enough for it to become meaningful?

One thing for you to try this week

Pick one thing that bores you but matters to you. Recommit to it this week. Reply and tell me why you stayed.

Last week’s breakthroughs

In last week’s newsletter, I asked you to let go of an outcome you’re trying to control, and just do the thing.

Dean came to terms with clients leaving:

This really resonated with me as I’m a health coach and I’ve recently had a few clients give notice.

I can take this personally sometimes and try to control it when that is impossible. I can do my job to the best of my ability but if they wanna leave they will.

It’s uncontrollable.

When you asked what I would do if it didn’t matter I realized I would be a more honest coach and give them more of the truths they need over sharing a half truth that won’t risk upsetting them.

So on reflection, if I stopped caring about whether people will leave, I would become a better coach.

If I coach better, they’re going to be less likely to leave. Crazy!

Melani is making the best of a bad period:

I was laid off three months ago, and as someone who has almost 10 years of working experience in content marketing and SEO, I didn’t expect it to be this hard to land a job offer.

Heck, not even a job offer—an interview!

I did everything I could. I began to network more, I started posting on LinkedIn, sent more than 100 applications, reached out to recruiters, went to workshops and conferences, tailored my CV and cover letters. And so on.

None of it seems to be working, so far.

Or is it just me trying to control the current job market?

And that’s when it hit me. I need to start learning more about AI. I need to upskill and use ‘the advantage’ of being unemployed to get ahead.

Also, I need to let go. Let go of the expectations. Not from others, but from myself. I am already out there, I push myself constantly. I need to stop for a second and give myself credit.

To all of you who are going through the same situation—you got this! It’s just a bad period, not a bad life.

Finally, Alexander is letting go of a future he cannot control:

I’ve been trying to control the outcome of being a good dad and never failing my son.

I’m still new to the game, he’s only 12 weeks old, but I’ve found myself stressing and worrying about the consequences of actions 10-15 years from now.

The reality is that I cannot control much about the next decade, but what I can do is the right things here and now.

I’d catch myself worrying about his financial future, whether he would be happy in the workplace, if I’d done the right things so far as a new dad, and realized that I was doing all of this whilst holding him and being with him. He wasn’t getting the best version of me there and then, and that’s what matters most.

I’m not saying it’s easy, or that I’m perfect, but being there now and focusing on that is going to be the thing that sets him up for the best future possible.

As always, send your breakthroughs by simply replying to this email. Let me know if you’d prefer to remain anonymous.

Until next week,

Mark Manson

#1 New York Times Bestselling Author
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