When Life Knocks You Down

34 people had breakthroughs this week. Will the next one be you?

Two things for you to think about

Our most painful experiences become our most defining moments. They determine who we are, or who we are not.

When life gives you lemons, lean back and squeeze that shit into your eyeballs. Then glare back at life and say, “that all you got, motherfucker?”

Three things for you to ask yourself

What have been the most defining moments in your life? Were they painful? How did you learn and grow from them?

One thing for you to try this week

Reframe a pain you’re currently experiencing as an opportunity for growth. Tell me how that changes your attitude towards the situation.

New This Week

Podcast: How to Take Back Your Own Mind (ft. Tim Urban)

In this latest podcast episode, I’m joined by my old friend Tim Urban, the mastermind behind the wildly popular blog Wait But Why. Known for his ability to break down complex topics with humor and stick-figure drawings, Tim has captured the attention of millions worldwide. From his early days as a blogger to the release of his first book, What’s Our Problem?: A Self-Help Book for Societies, Tim has consistently delivered thought-provoking content that challenges our understanding of the world around us.

We dive into pressing issues like unfettered tribalism, the concept of “idea prisons,” and the potential impact of AI on society. Tim also shares personal insights as a new parent and teases his upcoming book. It’ll challenge your perspectives and leave you craving more of Tim’s signature blend of depth, wit, and accessibility. Don’t miss this captivating conversation that tackles the complexities of our modern world head-on. Enjoy.

Last week’s breakthroughs

In last week’s newsletter, I asked you to admit a flaw to someone you care about and let me know how they react. Dorothy phoned a close friend:

I thought about your request for us to think about a flaw. I chose ‘impatience’ which in my mind I have plenty of.

I phoned a close friend and was shocked when she burst out saying ‘what, you are the opposite of someone who isn’t patient. You are always under control, polite, gentle, etc.!’ Plus, she doesn’t think that I have virtually any flaws!!! I was flabbergasted.

Alan revealed his lifelong flaw to his wife:

Between reading your book and therapy, I’ve discovered that my main flaw is shame. It was currency in my family when I grew up and kind of a family badge of (dis)honor. My therapist helped me see that the shame that I had been carrying, which I did not choose consciously to have, had been sabotaging my entire life and nearly cost me my marriage.

So I decided to admit this flaw to my wife. Turns out she was very sympathetic and on my side, even though I had hurt her over the past few years. We have had a lot of conflict, I’ve lost grip on the family finances, not been present, and haven’t been a great husband and father. But as we both sat in tears and held each other, I knew that telling her was the right thing to do.

The future looks bright. We have made plans to get out of debt, improve our bond, and heal emotionally. Doing the hard thing can sometimes be scary but is so worth it in the long run.

Finally, professionals are flawed humans, just like the rest of us:

I’ve learned this through my journey in life, but most of all through my role as a therapist. My clients don’t want me to be a perfect person. They want me to be a messy person, a real authentic effed up human, that also has some skills I can teach, a great pair of ears and a really big heart. So I lean into my dumpster fire. And they love every minute of it.

As always, send your breakthroughs by simply replying to this email. Let me know if you’d prefer to remain anonymous.

Until next week,

Mark Manson

#1 New York Times Bestselling Author
My Website – My Books – My YouTube Channel – My Podcast